Can't talk, gotta go buy a $300 Renault to convert into a sweet tank for the future snowmageddons.Wednesday, June 23, 2010
IN SOVIET RUSSIA A TANK TREADS YOU
Can't talk, gotta go buy a $300 Renault to convert into a sweet tank for the future snowmageddons.
Friday, June 11, 2010
LOVECRAFT AND PROVIDENCE
About 3 years back, I went on a sad, geeky pilgrimage to check out Lovecraft's neighborhood a walk around his beloved Providence, RI. It was a blustery November day when I set out early in the afternoon. Most of the stuff is located in a tight clump NE of the Brown campus. It's a cool old area filled with kooky houses, windy roads and hills.
I took my camera along to document the sights, and with a crummy list of places to visit culled from the interwebs, got to it. I've posted most of the highlights here. Finally. I 've been meaning to show this off for ages, but just sat on the images for years. Lazy I guess. Now that I'm actually slated to live there in a month or so, I figured it'd be fun to show off my future stomping grounds (well mostly, we're located a bit North of here, but is like 2 miles.). So off we go! Warning this shit is nerdy saddo territory wherein I travel to worship hallowed ground.
I parked just in front of this church and figured I'd head up into the hill and loop back down later. This was a favorite place of both Edgar Allan Poe and Lovecraft. Ya know, hangin' around graveyards get you street cred. It is mentioned in several of Lovecraft's stories, including "The Shunned House" and "The Case of Charles Dexter Ward." I wound my way around it for a bit, got looked at funny by people in the modern apartments that overlook the graveyard, then struck North for Benefit St..
Benefit is a lovely little old road with tons of olde tyme charme. A bit down the road was a huge yellow house. This was "The Shunned House" of Lovecraft's story of the same name. Well mostly. It was supposedly derelict and in disrepair in his day, but his Aunt lived there for a few years. Poison vapors, corse-light, mold, and gigantic underground humanoids! Yay! All in that there basement.
Further down Benefit near an intersection, I came across this weird building. Lovecraft's body was viewed here at a funeral before burial when the property was known as the Knowles Funeral Home. Probably in that goofy bulge on the backside of the house. I found a neat bike path and snaked my way towards my next point of interest.
Walking up on this place was a trip. The cool lamps and the triangular roof. Figures it's steps away from where the RISD kids take care of their day to day arty farty duties. It's a super neato old library thing that Lovecraft used to hang around a bunch. So did Poe. It's mentioned in "The Shunned House" and "The Case of Charles Dexter Ward." Inside was exceedingly quiet and heavy with that soporific aged library smell. I can name a few booky ladyfriends who'd swoon whilst within these walls. I soaked it up, checked out the lower level and hit the streets. The warmth of the place was a welcome break from the punishing cold wind I was dealing with.
So I exited The Atheneum and took a right up a steep ass hill that leads to the old college area. Basically, we're getting in MU territory now. Anywho, Lovecraft's house used to be right up against this place. It would've been behind the library from the angle of this photo. Was said that he could see the stacks from his kitchen or some such. Library has a collection of Lovecraft manuscripts that I will attempt to go breathe on. So long as I make my Fast Talk check...
Across the street are these gates that lead to the College Green at Brown/Miskatonic. A well known photo of the old man has him seated in the low stone bench pictured to the left. Yeah, I sat in the bench too.
Striking North now (I knew it was North because it felt like I was going up) I stumbled onto a nerdy memorial plaque placed just across the street from Brown on Prospect. It was apparently placed there by the city on the centennial of his birth in 1990. I stopped and read the inscription, which was from some poem by him. Maybe something to do with Yuggoth, Onwards!
Always heading up hill it seems in this place. Gah. At the peak of the hill, pretty much at the highest point in the city is Lovecraft's last house (the one that was located behind the library). It was moved to this location in 1959. He lived there until his death in 1937. This place was used as the basis for the house of Robert Blake in "The Haunter Of The Dark". I nice little place with fun windows poking out of the roof. Finally on level ground, I set out to find a very unique park.
Just a block or two (well I guess everything is just a block or two away in this town) from the house I found Prospect Terrace Park. This was one of Lovecraft's fave places to hang out and read. I plan on doing the same. It overlooks the majestic State House and is a rad little park that offers potentially dope sunsets. It's just a cool piece of flat land with stylish lamps and railings. I suspect on a misty evening this place would exude malignant shadows (at least in my mind) and dudes in trenchcoats which hide their tentacled arms. Providence's founder is buried here as well. It was also mentioned in Dexter Ward.
The Halsey House was used as the basis for the Ward house in "The Case of Charles Dexter Ward." It's a cool old mansion with some overgrown walls. Supposedly haunted in Lovecraft's day. By now the sun was beginning to get low and the wind had kicked up. My frozen fingers got off a few shots, but I need to hustle down some hills in order to get to my final stop.
But, this weird ass tiny house in the neighborhood caught my eye. IN the middl eof all these lovely victorian, stately houses was this squat pile of goofery. Turns out it was used as the little white farm house described in Dexter Ward. I marched off to my car in hopes of beating the sunset.
Yes, I had to do the visit the grave thing. I am a sad person. Fun side note, Swan Point is actually about a 1/4 mile from our house and located in the swank chunk of the East Side. It's a well wooded area completely surrounded by a stone wall, then a cove. Very tranquil, peaceful place. I had mapped out where I was going ahead of time, but apparently if you actually head to the office for info, they'll already know why you're there and tell you how to get the grave site. There's a big marker for his parents, then smaller markers for him and his wife. And once more, yes, I ventured further into saddo-ville by leaving a little Elder Sign there for him. Just in case some outer god jerks try and pull some slimy shit.
The sun was leaving me and I needed to get back in the car, warm up , and head home. It was an interesting day. If you hare a favorite author and come upon the opportunity to do a solo walking tour ( I stress solo/non-paid tour) of their old haunts, do so. And if you come up to visit us in Providence and have interest I'll certainly drag you along this route.
I took my camera along to document the sights, and with a crummy list of places to visit culled from the interwebs, got to it. I've posted most of the highlights here. Finally. I 've been meaning to show this off for ages, but just sat on the images for years. Lazy I guess. Now that I'm actually slated to live there in a month or so, I figured it'd be fun to show off my future stomping grounds (well mostly, we're located a bit North of here, but is like 2 miles.). So off we go! Warning this shit is nerdy saddo territory wherein I travel to worship hallowed ground.
St. John's Episcopal Church
I parked just in front of this church and figured I'd head up into the hill and loop back down later. This was a favorite place of both Edgar Allan Poe and Lovecraft. Ya know, hangin' around graveyards get you street cred. It is mentioned in several of Lovecraft's stories, including "The Shunned House" and "The Case of Charles Dexter Ward." I wound my way around it for a bit, got looked at funny by people in the modern apartments that overlook the graveyard, then struck North for Benefit St..
135 Benefit St.
Benefit is a lovely little old road with tons of olde tyme charme. A bit down the road was a huge yellow house. This was "The Shunned House" of Lovecraft's story of the same name. Well mostly. It was supposedly derelict and in disrepair in his day, but his Aunt lived there for a few years. Poison vapors, corse-light, mold, and gigantic underground humanoids! Yay! All in that there basement.
187 Benefit Street
Further down Benefit near an intersection, I came across this weird building. Lovecraft's body was viewed here at a funeral before burial when the property was known as the Knowles Funeral Home. Probably in that goofy bulge on the backside of the house. I found a neat bike path and snaked my way towards my next point of interest.
The Atheneum
Walking up on this place was a trip. The cool lamps and the triangular roof. Figures it's steps away from where the RISD kids take care of their day to day arty farty duties. It's a super neato old library thing that Lovecraft used to hang around a bunch. So did Poe. It's mentioned in "The Shunned House" and "The Case of Charles Dexter Ward." Inside was exceedingly quiet and heavy with that soporific aged library smell. I can name a few booky ladyfriends who'd swoon whilst within these walls. I soaked it up, checked out the lower level and hit the streets. The warmth of the place was a welcome break from the punishing cold wind I was dealing with.
The John Hay Library
So I exited The Atheneum and took a right up a steep ass hill that leads to the old college area. Basically, we're getting in MU territory now. Anywho, Lovecraft's house used to be right up against this place. It would've been behind the library from the angle of this photo. Was said that he could see the stacks from his kitchen or some such. Library has a collection of Lovecraft manuscripts that I will attempt to go breathe on. So long as I make my Fast Talk check...
Van Wickle Gates
Across the street are these gates that lead to the College Green at Brown/Miskatonic. A well known photo of the old man has him seated in the low stone bench pictured to the left. Yeah, I sat in the bench too.
H. P. Lovecraft memorial plaque.
Striking North now (I knew it was North because it felt like I was going up) I stumbled onto a nerdy memorial plaque placed just across the street from Brown on Prospect. It was apparently placed there by the city on the centennial of his birth in 1990. I stopped and read the inscription, which was from some poem by him. Maybe something to do with Yuggoth, Onwards!
65 Prospect Street
Always heading up hill it seems in this place. Gah. At the peak of the hill, pretty much at the highest point in the city is Lovecraft's last house (the one that was located behind the library). It was moved to this location in 1959. He lived there until his death in 1937. This place was used as the basis for the house of Robert Blake in "The Haunter Of The Dark". I nice little place with fun windows poking out of the roof. Finally on level ground, I set out to find a very unique park.
Prospect Terrace Park
Just a block or two (well I guess everything is just a block or two away in this town) from the house I found Prospect Terrace Park. This was one of Lovecraft's fave places to hang out and read. I plan on doing the same. It overlooks the majestic State House and is a rad little park that offers potentially dope sunsets. It's just a cool piece of flat land with stylish lamps and railings. I suspect on a misty evening this place would exude malignant shadows (at least in my mind) and dudes in trenchcoats which hide their tentacled arms. Providence's founder is buried here as well. It was also mentioned in Dexter Ward.
140 Prospect Street
The Halsey House was used as the basis for the Ward house in "The Case of Charles Dexter Ward." It's a cool old mansion with some overgrown walls. Supposedly haunted in Lovecraft's day. By now the sun was beginning to get low and the wind had kicked up. My frozen fingers got off a few shots, but I need to hustle down some hills in order to get to my final stop.
Little White Farmhouse
But, this weird ass tiny house in the neighborhood caught my eye. IN the middl eof all these lovely victorian, stately houses was this squat pile of goofery. Turns out it was used as the little white farm house described in Dexter Ward. I marched off to my car in hopes of beating the sunset.
Swan Point Cemetery
Yes, I had to do the visit the grave thing. I am a sad person. Fun side note, Swan Point is actually about a 1/4 mile from our house and located in the swank chunk of the East Side. It's a well wooded area completely surrounded by a stone wall, then a cove. Very tranquil, peaceful place. I had mapped out where I was going ahead of time, but apparently if you actually head to the office for info, they'll already know why you're there and tell you how to get the grave site. There's a big marker for his parents, then smaller markers for him and his wife. And once more, yes, I ventured further into saddo-ville by leaving a little Elder Sign there for him. Just in case some outer god jerks try and pull some slimy shit.
The sun was leaving me and I needed to get back in the car, warm up , and head home. It was an interesting day. If you hare a favorite author and come upon the opportunity to do a solo walking tour ( I stress solo/non-paid tour) of their old haunts, do so. And if you come up to visit us in Providence and have interest I'll certainly drag you along this route.
Wednesday, June 9, 2010
STAND UP AND PAY $22.
Ugh. Not only is it a Twilight photo op, but it's a photo op with Kristen-stutter-actor-superstar-Stewart sporting some legendary DC stylings. Sure she plays Joan Jett in that movie and probably borrowed it from wardrobe (given that she had a Specials and a Joy Division shirt on as well in the same time frame) - but that song didn't even exist (81) in the timeframe of The Runaways (79). Let alone a T-shirt. Get 'em while Hot Topic still gots 'em. Bah. Yes, the photo is a year old, I am slow.
In other terrible things that teen-girls endorse and perpetuate news, have a look see at these rock and roll starz that make boatloads of cash. This Hawthorne Heights photo is #1 fun. 2nd from the left makes it so that I can't see from all the tears of laughter. "Mmeeeeh, hello, I have feeeelings. I am in a mallpunk band and want to touch your feeeeeelings. Maaaeh." And th eone dude peering in from behind looks like blonde Jake. Jake is in lots of shitty bands it seems. Plus there's a new awesome video to make fun of! Not only does the song title raise some WTFs, but the make-up is pretty great. I wonder if they even know that they are stepping on the toes of giants. These guys need to become skeletons for real.Wednesday, June 2, 2010
GODDAMN I HOPE THIS LIVES UP TO ITS POTENTIAL
I love this black and white comic. Picked up The Walking Dead when it first hit because it had rad art (Yay Tony Moore!). Haven't looked back. It's not just zombies yelling BRAINS! and slobbering gore, though there is plenty of gore. That's just not the complete focus. The series instead decides to linger on the paranoia, fear, and uncertainty that the survivors of an unknown zombie holocaust would potentially feel. So the most dangerous things out there aren't the roamers or herds, it's that secret psychopath you picked up last week who is slowly working out his plan to eat you all in your sleep, then steal your guns. You never ever feel safe, not from the people you trust, the folks you meet, or the undead just beyond the barricade. It's awesome.Anywho, heard it was maybe going the movie route, then it went the TV route real fast and the TV route is being handled by AMC and AMC does Breaking Bad and all this sounds good to me. For example: It's set in Atlanta, so they are shooting in Atlanta. What a concept huh? The few test shots of zombies thus far, like the one above, are super. It all sounds and looks like the folks behind it give a shit. Let's just hope they don't bail on some of the more f'd up, pivotal scenes from the series. Count me down as excited for something.
Thursday, May 27, 2010
I'VE HEARD THAT THE 60'S WERE AWESOME - BUT NO ONE REMEMBERS CONCRETE DETAILS THANKS TO KITCHEN PARTIES AND MATCHING REFRIGERATOR DECOR. AND DRUGS.
This is a commercial. For Westinghouse refrigerators and stuff. But I seemed to have missed that point due to fishnets and shaking areas.
Thursday, May 20, 2010
IS IT JUST LURKING IN THE BACK OF OUR MINDS? or YEAH I STOLE THAT SHIT YO
Some super uncanny parallels all over this mofo, from paint schemes to general critter design. Though I'm sure hours of research could turn the tables on just about any film or story. I guess the take away here is that old Flash Gordan serials are awesome.
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
LEST WE FORGET - LIGHTNING STRIKES AGAIN AND AGAIN or SNK'S NEW WAVE FIGHTER
Klaus Nomi. Germany's DEVO. So dope.
He was a cardboard and electrical tape wonder.
In my mind, there needs to be a Samurai Showdown/Street Fighter type 2D brawler where 80's/New Wave bands like Art Of Noise, Taco, Falco, and Kajagoogoo kick the shit out of Lady Gaga. Earthquake stays selectable, since he looks like he could start some sorta new wavey band instantly.
The little girl creature from this video got me stoked as a kid.
She'd get to point at stuff, then dudes would destroy it. Rad.
Not sure if I posted this before, but, whatever.
She'd get to point at stuff, then dudes would destroy it. Rad.
Not sure if I posted this before, but, whatever.
Thursday, May 13, 2010
OHHHHHHHHH GOOD. IT'S WHAT I'VE ALWAYS WANTED or BLADE RUNNER WAS RIGHT
TVs at the damn pump. Really. A great #1 super best idea.I dropped by a Shell late last night as the car was on the dreaded orange light of doom. Swiped the card, dropped the nozzle in, and was horrified when a voice behind me boomed "WELCOME! WE'RE GLAD YOU COULD BE WITH US!" I spun around, and there's a tiny Asian man stuffed in a yellow screen smiling at me.
Next thing I know, I'm getting peppered by 10,0000 decibel ads on how Shell gas is awesome. Then it went into a bit on home improvement tips from a bald dude on how you shouldn't paint your home in colors you actually like as you should instead pick neutrals so you can always be thinking about resale value (living is fun!). Whaaa? Not missing a beat, I get the weather report next.
At this point I'm yelling at a TV screen at midnight on Georgia Ave and telling it to shut the fuck up.
But it doesn't listen. It plows on into some other Shell related BS at random and it's like watching a game of Dragon's Lair, but without any Bluth art or Dragons or Lairs. It was so loud and obnoxious. Then the Asian dude pops back up and wishes me well. Fuck you.
I kinda always thought the relentless ads and that flying shit in Blade Runner were crazy nutty. Sadly, Shell or some other evil douche bag is probably already knee deep in developing hoverbot ads to annoy the bejesus out of us all.
I'm never going to Shell again if I can help it.
Thursday, May 6, 2010
EVERYTHING AND SHIT'S MAGIC YO. OR: HOW THE FUCK DO MAGNETS WORK?
I am completely ignorant of the Insane Clown Posse. I only learned what a Juggalo was about 2 years ago. I was happy before I knew this term and of them and their goofy world and the redonkadonk number of Juggalos out there. I try to go on with what tattered remnants of a soul that I have left.Anywho, I hit upon this video by them entitled "Miracles". And I am floored. Upon watching and listening to the heavy, way deep, meaningful, life changing lyrics, I find myself confused. Are they putting for the notion of "Fuck science and shit" or is it "Science can blow me and shit, stuff happens and that's that", or perhaps "Magic is everywhere and science is shitty an' shit"? I have no real clue. It matters not.
Lyrics and deep meaning aside, this video encompasses everything I look for and love in a music video. These being:A: One completely ridiculous concept.
B: A nonexistent budget.
C: A huge idea that can never be fulfilled by the budget.
D: Dudes in makeup.
E: Eventual space travel.
F: Childbirth allusions.
G: Fuckin' rainbows.
H: Most importantly, instilling a sense of complete confusion in the viewer.
Here are some great quotes and items to look for:1. "Music is all magic. You can't even hold it. It's just there in the air."
2. "Crows! Ghosts!"
3. The dude's kids in make-up. One of them gives us a coy look that chills me.
4. "Fuckin' rainbows after it rains."
5. Oh man, #5 is so good. So good it gets +51 to it's THAC0.
56. "How the fuck do magnets work?"
7. "I seen shit that'll shock your eyelids"
8. "Pure motha fuckin' magic"
9. Deep thinkin' clown faced guy.
It's worth trolling through the comments on youtube itself. There are some gems. Like "Green screens, how the fuck do they work?!"
Don't feel like watching the whole video? Fine be a quitter and continue to suck. But, please redeem yourself a wee bit and hit this deep link to the finest line in the whole video that comes after all the other good parts:
Tuesday, May 4, 2010
WATCH ME DO A KANGAROO HOP, THEN KICK IT OUT ON THE TABLETOP
BMX and bikes were so important growing up. Every waking hour out of school was spent on or near a bike if the weather was decent. On the bus I'd read Radical Rick comics. And once I was able to bike to school in 7th grade, the bus could eat my ass. We even went and built a rather large track in the woods with sick jumps and banked curves. Many a scar on my body originates from that track and the stupid tricks attempted with zero practice. Helmets? Whaaaaa?
When the weather was shit, HBO seemed to always to have some excellent schlock on. Back then HBO ruled (that old opening where you go through the model city and blast into space to the HBO logo is probably the greatest thing HBO has ever produced) and had crappy movies on all the time. One year it seemed like the film BMX Bandits was on every friggin' day. I've seen it so many times it hurts.One of the more confusing aspects of the film to my pre-teen brain was the love triangle in the movie. It got in the way of the shit I wanted to see (jumps and wheelies accentuated with laser noises) and never really resolved itself. They're just pals in the end, but both PJ and Goose (Goooooooose! Noooooo! Gooooose!) totally wanted to hit that prime, BMX toned, Nicole Kidman ass. At the end in the credits, they all win trophies for being BMX masters/funding the construction of a track. How are they going to celebrate and resolve their unfounded desires? Who will Powderpuff choose? No joke, but years later, when I deciphered the dirty meaning of "Chinese Handcuffs", my mind leapt to the BMX Bandit triangle and I knew the answer.
Anyways, to get back on track, much like RAD, the end credits of the film were nothing but BMX porn. RAD was all flatland tricks galore. BMX Bandits was about kicking some ass. Except BMX Bandits had a super rock star song attached to it as well. After watching the credits, we'd be so pumped to go out and do tricks or construct a retardedly huge launch ramp. It all led to the inevitable wreck, followed by loose skin and the picking of rocks out of scrapes. Good times. (you see we ignored the warning that shows up about a minute into the video)
GET PUMPED!
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