TVs at the damn pump. Really. A great #1 super best idea.
I dropped by a Shell late last night as the car was on the dreaded orange light of doom. Swiped the card, dropped the nozzle in, and was horrified when a voice behind me boomed "WELCOME! WE'RE GLAD YOU COULD BE WITH US!" I spun around, and there's a tiny Asian man stuffed in a yellow screen smiling at me.
Next thing I know, I'm getting peppered by 10,0000 decibel ads on how Shell gas is awesome. Then it went into a bit on home improvement tips from a bald dude on how you shouldn't paint your home in colors you actually like as you should instead pick neutrals so you can always be thinking about resale value (living is fun!). Whaaa? Not missing a beat, I get the weather report next.
At this point I'm yelling at a TV screen at midnight on Georgia Ave and telling it to shut the fuck up.
But it doesn't listen. It plows on into some other Shell related BS at random and it's like watching a game of Dragon's Lair, but without any Bluth art or Dragons or Lairs. It was so loud and obnoxious. Then the Asian dude pops back up and wishes me well. Fuck you.
I kinda always thought the relentless ads and that flying shit in Blade Runner were crazy nutty. Sadly, Shell or some other evil douche bag is probably already knee deep in developing hoverbot ads to annoy the bejesus out of us all.
I'm never going to Shell again if I can help it.