Wednesday, March 4, 2009

iFAIL. THE TARD-POCALYPSE IS COMING.

Jeepers, I better stay home. My hair. No. Help. This is just one of many terrrrrrible apps out there that are actually making money. Recession my ass! That's 2 bucks well spent to own the "Haircaster" app. I'd like it more if the lady's hair and expression matched the "Hair Conditions" for the day. Shouldn't she be wearing a mask of terror? Are we not stupid enough nowadays due to cell phones that we actually need a hair conditions guide? Just go out the front fucking door. Onwards...

Yes! Since iFart made a jillion bucks (no joke) why not a puking sound effect program! Yeah! Awesome! Jobs are hard! Thinking sucks!

The 2 reviews pretty much sum it all up. Click to get the full size version and revel in the death of teh english languagez. Also, how does a total of 2, 5 star reviews average out to be a 2 star rating? Appull Maff?

8 comments:

rick smith said...

What is "piking?" In context? Here: "It almost made my brother pike!"

Scot said...

piking is the sudden urge to go fishing for pike. it only happens when you are confronted with an apple program so pointless that you decide you must go outside and do anything to avoid becoming a frigging waste of life bag of shit. unfortunately, it is always too late.

Ack Ack Ack said...

In all fairness, this isn't an Apple program. It's some junk that some guy named Igor came up with and uploaded. Apple is merely taking 30% of the App's sales. Though I guess Apple did approve it. Freedom isn't free, it's full of douche bags, and you have to let them play too!

Jessica said...

Ricky, I think it's retarded-typing-version of "puke."

Or wait.
Were you being sarcastic?

I hate that I miss emoticons.

FaceMeltingDesigns said...

I'm working on an iPhone app right now where the phone takes an actual shit in your mouth while you are using it. I think I will make millions.

Scot said...

"I'd buy that for a dollar!"

cue canned laughter

Dave said...

This just goes to show there a lot of idiots that own iPhones. That kid that made the first review must be like 12.

I do remember a particular group of people that would spend more than a dollar renting the worst movie that they could dig up at the video store every Tuesday.

Now, if you cold buy a phone that would take an actual shit in your mouth while using it, I'd be on the waiting list.

Ack Ack Ack said...

Since these apps apply to ipod touch as well, you can't really pin the hate on merely iphone owners Davey ol' boy. Tards aplenty have touches.

And you speak as though bad movie night is a thing of the past. It lives! I'd spend 3 bucks anytime to watch gems like Warriors of the Wasteland on my ipod.