Tuesday, August 12, 2008

Still angry, after all these years.

This'll really only make sense to a few folks out there, but that will just make your secret knowledge all the richer. In any case I received yesterday, a textbook bit of rant from my favorite master of Kempo. No, not that Jeff Speakman guy. I present an unabridged paragraph entitled (his title) "Angry White Male rants from a clown in a dolphins hat that I used to live with in college".

"i spend a lot of time bass fishing the pond near my house. i bought a new reel simply because it is called the escalade. i wanted something fancy to match my neighbors. most of them work at places like autozone but drive bmw's, benzes and caddillacs. i cant afford a four wheeled escalade, but the reel has 11 bearings and a nifty design. you have to love the interest only arm loan. that is how people buy houses for $300 a month and lease a luxury vehicle when they make min wage......and live with shlubs like me who have a 6 figure income and a 30 year mortgage on a now worthless house. why worthless? this place looks like a mix of a trailer park and south central la. nothing says class like a primered old bmw parked on a man's lawn. now the government is going to bail out fannie mae and freddie mac so these people can turn their $300 interest payment into a real loan. good use of my tax dollars. why did i vote republican? oh yeah, that is right. they are about low taxes and good economy. now i feel better."

Really, he's harmless. So long as you're not some old dude in a pool. A free sock full of ass-pennies for the correct guess as to our mystery writer's identity.

9 comments:

Ethan said...

Wait, does he have his own blog?

I'm not sure I understand. Is he being sarcastic at the end?

Ack Ack Ack said...

No, just sent me an email full of crazy and said now post this. So I did. I'd say he's being pretty sarcastic.

Crazy Cohen said...

Is it the infamous Scott?

Aimee said...

Scot! I knew as soon as I saw the Dolphins hat.

Crazy Cohen said...

Where's my ass-pennies?

KEAM said...

i did vote republican in 04 b/c i am a fiscal conservative (to use overused labels) and i am still angry. so i guess you could say i was being sarcastic.

now excuse me while i play gta 4 on xbox live so i can curse out little shit kids who step to me over the internet. fucking rich kids. when i was 8 i had only memories of the atari my fat babysitter broke when she accidentally sat on it.

Crazy Cohen said...

Use the knife on them. It's the best way to go.

Dave said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Dave said...

The is only one Dolphins fan that lived in Delaware that wasn't Ty's brother so this narrows it down...