I can only really, really, really hope that this website and the service it proposes to guarantee is a joke. Which is definitely quite likely given the "About Us" page. And if so, I wish it well. If not, well, I wish it well. Hooray for the ease of Paypal! Unfortunately, the Rapture Survival Guide is out of stock.
And in honor of such a ridiculous service, I'm stuffing Kevin Costner - from his super dope role which put the postman in The Postman - into artist renditions of the Rapture.