Showing posts with label Jesus. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Jesus. Show all posts

Thursday, February 18, 2010

LET THERE BE LIGHT! (AS IN MAKING LIGHT OF MAKING MONEY OFF OF FOOLS.)

Terrify your children with this crazy shit!

"No, that's cool Dad, I'll just read in the dark."
Grab JC's junk and flip away!
Each upward flick brings new life to a room!
Whilst a downward press plunges the room in to demon filled darkness!

"Bedtime is great because it's now a terrifying life or death battle for my soul."
Classic crap from back in the day. Pajamas that double as THE ARMOR OF GOD! Nice. Think these folks went out business. I mean, yeah.

"Jeepers, it's like he knows exactly what I'm thinking of doing after Sunday School."
From the pitch: "When was the last time your class saw how 'HOT' God's Word is? Open this authentic-looking 'Bible' and begin to share the scripture for the day as real flames are seen coming from your 'Bible'. This full-size book comes with a battery-operated ignition system. All you supply are the batteries, lighter fluid and composure..."

"Uh, no, really grandma, I'll just stand."
Got nothing to add to this piece of wonderment.

Special thanks to my trapped Frenchie Floridian penpal for today's inspiration.