Thursday, January 28, 2010

ADOBE'S PISSED

While watching the whole ipad thing on my lunch (new saddo level reached, I was WATCHING a damn live blog) I nearly spit out my hummus and chips when ol' Steve Jobs fired up his new device. Not because it was mindblowingly awesomesauce. Because Jobs hit the interwebs, which hit a Flash site and BAM, front and center the "this jobby won't run Flash" icon was there. This had to be a goof. Why would you load a busted screen at an unveiling lots and lots of people would be checking out? Or was it a fuck you?


It seems that with the 3 years or so since the iphone and itouches launched, people have been missing out on a decent chunk of the internet. And don't sit there and tell me Apple could't fix this issue in that amount of time. Just don't. Other mobile devices can hack it, so can the fucking iphone. So, is Apple forcing the internet to evolve in some sorta creepy powerplay? To dump Flash and move forward with newer, less busted stop-gaps like plugins? I'm not sure I like how it's being done if so, but I'm OK with things changing.

Either way, Adobe is pissed.

26 comments:

Aimee said...

I'm pretty sure Scooby Doo says, "Ruh-Roh, Raggy" You and Steve Jobs need to get it right next time.

Ack Ack Ack said...

Oh snap. Ya done pulled the rubber mask off my aging Scooby Doo reference skillz. Turns out it was the old museum caretaker, not me.

Murphy said...

The Ipad will be the West Bromwich Albion FC of E-readers.

Digest my wisdom...sluts.

Anonymous said...

I find myself desperately wanting to agree with Murphy's statement. But my effort to agree is akin to Non's flaccid-eyebeam stick-burning skills.

Something's buggy with Flash script. From small ads to programs like Ableton Live, Flash can run loops that put my Powerbook CPU into a frenzy. A Mozilla developer once told me that Flash was devil spawn. I tend to agree with things said by something called a "Mozilla," even if it sounds like a Martin Lawrence man-in-suit flim.

I blame Adobe...but I cool my crotch with Flashblocker.

Chris Horse said...

Adobe can go suck a large, throbbing cock

Flash is a horrible CPU hog, standards-crusher and should rank up there with Adobe's embarassing PDF flaws that are quickly becoming a larger security concern than that abortion of a social network called Facebook.

Adobe has already built a worse security-fix record than Microsoft. They know where the security holes are and drag their feet in fixing it.

Look at Google's fast adoption of HTML 5 - already they are transitioning YouTube over. That means no Flash needed. Apple has built a user experience that is Flash free. With two of the industry's biggest players pissing on Flash hopefully it won't be long before Adobe's bastard child is relegated to the same corner of the web as burning, spinning logos.

So, yes I would put some credence into Jobs doing that on purpose - and kudos to him. Fuck Flash. It needs to die with Internet Explorer as two pieces of tech that mangled the web.

Ack Ack Ack said...

+10000000000
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Googol for you!

rick smith said...

fuck-a-iPod.

Ack Ack Ack said...

Withering insight.

Minus googol for you!

rick smith said...

yeah, i meant fuck-a-iPad, but i was too lazy to go back and delete and correct.

rick smith said...

Let me know when you can run Photoshop or Painter on that piece or use a stylus directly on the screen. THEN it'll be useful and THEN I may be interested in what Steve Jobbers has to peddle. Until then it's a glorified iPhone that can't make calls and is too wide to easily type properly on. Single digit finger poke anyone?

Murphy said...

The phrase "single digit finger poke" conjures images that have nothing remotely to do with Ipods or Ipads...

rick smith said...

Yeah, now that you say that. Brings to mind what Steve Jobs is doing to our anuses.

Ack Ack Ack said...

Phone wise, you can certainly use VOIP on this thing. There's a native paint program on the iPad and you could fashion a stylus out of just about anything. Not what you're looking for or the context you'd wanna use it, but doable. That's a whole 'nother machine your asking for.

However, this is not really meant to be a hardcore paint/photoshop production device. Think you're missing the point there. It's a media/leisure/info device. It's for that weird middle ground that Netbooks sorta fill and itouches/phones/androids/Kindle and such poorly fill.

The potential for this lies in the devs and what the come up with. Think about what you could do for print media gone digital with such a device (Apple owned or otherwise).

In nerd realms, you could have full color rulebooks with embedded video to explain rules that are worded weirdly, but completely clear when you see it played out. Complete model assembly diagrams for models. And all this info could be updated (no more FAQs) instantly. Dope.

Not to mention the potential for playing boardgames with pals who live states away using an interactive format and a wifi connection. (I know boargames on the web kinda defeats the purpose, but it may be a necessity in some cases if you are a hopeless nerd but far from other hopeless nerds you trust)

In print, such a video-booky-thing could bring that dying realm back to life. People might pay a few bucks a month to get what they already get in crummy PDF form if it talks back to them, plays videos, has mp3's for interviews and crosswords/sudoku that explode or some shit when you solve it. There's some nice potential there.

All said, I agree that the iPad as it stands is a bit underwhelming. Missing some bells and whistles. Typical Apple BS where they drag the 1st adopters through a year with a gimpy device, then unleash the new hotness and get the double dip.

'Cept I don't think that's gonna happen this time around. People are wise to the game. Wait and see could be the undoing of the iPad, leaving room for someone else to swoop in and offer that which Apple don't. Again, this thing's future lies in the hands of all the Devs rushing as we speak to make that killer App.

rick smith said...

Here's an Acer Netbook with real keyboard with 250GB at half ($419.99) the price. iPad with 64GB is...$829. And you can just as easily use iTunes, store photos, use google maps, store people in an address book as you can on the iPad. Bottom line is that the iPad is extremely over priced for what it does.

I like working on macs, but I want to be able to WORK on them. The iPad does not increase work flow. You can't do a thing on an iPad other than use some apps, browse the web, watch movies. It could really do so much more. It could be a small, easily transportable work station that allows you to draw or paint directly on it's surface...do design work as you travel into the office. Allow digital artist to work outdoors, unfettered by cables or wacom tablets.

But you can't.

And if they did figure that out and add the power and tech to it, it would be so expensive that you might as well just buy a Mac Book Pro and be right back at square one with your unwieldy cords.

Apple used to make machines for "creative folk." Now they just make "hot, new gadgets." They also used to say that they wanted to make computers available to the masses again. Make them easy to use for work and play. Now their devices are the rolls-royce of the computer world; only really available to folks with disposable incomes or large businesses. And most of the ones that are somewhat affordable are only really for play.

rick smith said...

But to get back to your original post, yes, Flash is a monster who either needs to have it's act cleaned up in a parking lot or get lost altogether.

However, I think that Apple purposely not supporting it and trying to squeeze it out of their end-user's grasp is unfair.

It may be that Apple's stranglehold on their own technology and selective inbreeding (working with Intel was a huge shocker) on their devices could be their own undoing.

rick smith said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
rick smith said...

sorry, no link was provided for the Acer Netbook: http://www.newegg.com/Product/Product.aspx?Item=N82E16834115736

Ack Ack Ack said...

Still think you're missing the point or I'm missing you're point. Like you sez, the reason this isn't a Star Trek PADD is because it would cost a zillion billion dollars and yeah you'd be better of with a real deal machine in the end. And said Acer book is indeed cheaper, but I challenge you to rock that on the subway or on the street with ease. Sorta like your ebooks vs real books argument.

This is an portable media/info device. Any tablet device, by any maker has my attention in this arena.

The masses can still buy a decent fast Mac Mini for cheap and add it to their current monitor set-up or get one for cheap. Again, this isn't that machine nor is it intended to be. It's it's own thing.

The 1st iPods were considered hot overpriced "gadgets" for rich bastards. Doomed to go away. And that sucker spawned an empire, then redesigned the digital marketplace by getting people to pay for digital goods with a single painless click.

This thing is a step in the right direction is all. The potential evolution is interesting. It is a bit pricey currently. But everything is when it first hits. A few years from now, every jerk will probably want one. Depending on what comes out for it.

In terms of pricey for what it can do, the Kindles/Nooks of the world are currently drowning in that pool right now. I'd expect a seeeeeerious price cut on those things (probably not some much the digi-books though) in a month if they expect to live any longer. In that case, I think the finger in your anus will actually be from Mr. Bezos.

I think we agree, just on different planes. As usual. I'm not getting one anytime soon. You're not getting one. Flash is a behemoth. We both want better things from such a tablet device.

Now, save me from all these cords. Cords cords cords.

rick smith said...

I'm upset because Apple products are overpriced. I think they didn't go as far as they could with this product. I also think that it would be harder to browse/type/browse on the iPad as it would on a netbook.

You know how crowded the Metro can get during rush hour. Let's say that you did actually manage to secure a seat, but it was a bench without another row in front of you. Can't put it up on your knees to type. So now you're typing with one finger, or trying to type with two and then the slides right off your legs because it has no grips on the backside to at least provide some sort of traction. Either you just broke an iPad or someone has just scored yours and walked off the train with it. Granted this is a "worst case" scenario, but trains do get a little crowded from time to time.

I suppose I'm being picky. But if I was to actually be able to afford something expensive like this thing, it should be able to do more and be a little more ergonomic.

Ack Ack Ack said...

But Steve Jobs said it was MAGIC. Made by Unicorns. Argument over!

Anonymous said...

I'm not sure how many arms and legs are needed in payment for a Wacom tablet. BUT! I've seen one in use for sound mixing and it's pretty rad. I imagine Photoshop-integration is even more rad. When the iPad grows a pair and becomes the iPud, I hope it'll run artisan programs.

http://www.wacom.com/pendisplays/DTZ2100.php

Chris Horse said...

Rick, I think by squishing together three separate issues, you might be making for a confusing argument.

Pricing on this is almost too hairy to debate without it amounting to nothing. Most of the other tablets at CES this year are in the same price band and running Windows. You REALLY want to fuck with a cut down version of Windows versus OSX? That extra money for a stable operating system goes a long way.

Second, machines at that size of a netbook or the iPad will never have the horsepower to do what you have envisioned them to do at the sub $1000 price point. Either you are generating too much heat with more powerful components, or components are priced out of bounds. Also more power means kiss battery life goodbye.

Third, the netbook - iPad market is not intended for anything resembling a power user. It's the Nintendo Wii area - broad appeal for light use. It's like asking a hammer to do fine cutting work on expensive crown molding. Wrong tool. I've got guys in my office bitching that they can't install anything custom on here but I can't put Linux on it . Well no fucking duh. It's not built for that, it's not intended for that, that's not its audience.

Fourth, I think it's a bit obtuse to comment on how ergonomic or lack of ergonomic it is until someone in this party can actually touch the thing. You are making marked suppositions based on a keynote speech broadcast over the web. In sixty days we can all go the Apple store and see whether you can truly type a decent message out on the keyboard in compromising positions.

In summary, this isn't a laptop, it's not a laptop replacement, it's not intended to be any of that. It's a new category of mobile / secondary computing device. The real question will be is THAT a problem that needed to be solved.

In the meantime, you should beat Wacom with a 2x4 to produce a wireless device. I mean, hell you can get their 20+ inch tablets now. Why can't they produce a wireless device designed for the artist?

Flash can still suck a dick. It deserves to be squeezed out - of my fat ass for being horrible.

rick smith said...

I suppose I just want it to be more than it really is. So much for wishful thinking.

Chris Horse said...

STOP YOUR DREAMING IT IS FOR DREAMERS!!!!!!!!!11111

There is nothing but cold, hard reality.

But I will still hug and love you,

All over.

rick smith said...

I love you, big boy.

Chris Horse said...

Just started reading the comments on Adobe's blog. Now that is some amusing anti-Flash pontifications.

Adobe got pwned on their own blog.

ha!