IRATE MOVIE MADMAN AHEAD

It all started with some back and forth about a Cobraman from a shitty movie named Dreamscape. It stars the evil gang dude who shot Cyrus in Warriors as a dreammaster-man who invades your shit and performs karate with space nunchucks and turns into a Cobraman that terrifies you. Then Cobraman gets a dream spear through the chest, utters "Daddy?" and dies. Awesome premise, bad execution. I believe the quote was "I was put into the Dreamscape while watching this trash." or something along those lines.

Anywho, the spirit of bad movie Tuesday from the dark, dim past known as "college" has been resurrected on some crazy blog I found. It's run my the mighty Shao Fe Combat Master. He is a Goliath ganger who spent all his skill upgrades on throw, just so that he could hurl you off the ledges and precipices in the nightmare underhives of Necromunda. When Shao Fe is not busy pumping up his Cawdor huckin' gunz, he spends down time at his gang's hideout with unsavory types like Robert Ginty, Harper, Demonfeet Warmonger, Ozzy, Calibus, Captain Delaware, and Animal Mother watching films and then rating them on some beserk 5 star system.

Join the fun here as Shao Fe mangles the new Terminator and manages to use the term "Soup Cooler" while talking about Taken.

P.S. Shao Fe is not who you think he is, so don't bother with assuming his name is Scot on any comment posts. He insists on being refered to ONLY as Shao Fe Combat Master. Or SFCM for short. Serious.

DO AS SHAO FE COMMANDS!

SNAKEBITED PART TOO

Even more horrible this time around! The sad thing is, that when your do a Google image search for "Snakebites" (Moderate Safe Search On), like I did yesterday, instead of horrific pus filled wounds - you're mostly greeted by another horror. Legions of woman-boys in MCR T-shirts preening for fucking Facebook photos. Snakebites are a goofy type of piercing. Though there were a few Snakebite Ork models mixed in there with the Emo-tards, 70% of the images came up with some form of androgynous nightmare. Enjoy the horror I've collected! All I can think of is the part in Mr. Holland's Opus when he sings BEAUTIFUL BEAUTIFUL BEAUTIFUL BEAUTIFUL BOOOOOOOOOY. In fact, play the link above in a tabbed window while you look at the images for maximum effect.

SNAKEBITED PART WON

It's summer! Look out for snakes!
In the fine tradition of the Lamprey post, behold:
SNAKEBITED PART WON!
Don't look if you like dogs, just ate, dislike snakes, think llamas are neat, or are a squeamish person.

It's cheap, I know. I'm sorry.
YOU LOOKED AT IT!
YOU CAN'T TAKE IT BACK!

I AM A SIMPLE MAN

I may be a bit behind the internet times, but some days I require little.

This is keyboard cat. Click image to check him on the Colbert Report.
Go here if you wish to view the whole original video.
(PS, the cat is now dead - Ciao Gato!)

REDAY, AIYM, FYURE!

Snap. This gem comes to you from Ultraman Tiga. A show where stuff is often labeled in English and 1 out of 10 tens times happens to be laughably misspelled. Not bad considering my Japanese. But, you figure someone on the show would check this stuff.

Still doesn't beat the "Downroading" screen that was displayed on a dude's computer as he downroaded some information at lightning fast Comcast speeds. Have to dig that one up for the future.

REALLY? ONE EYED MONSTER?

Sure, why not. No worse than Teeth I guess.
When does Butt-monster come out?

I HIT MY HEAD. I'M SEEING DOUBLE.

"We are wearing our old bedsheets."

Double Dare indeed! Oh, the hair tangles!
Stolen from here. Plenty more.

I HAVE A SINGULARITY IN MY PANTS

The new Star Trek movie made me feel like I was the one standing where Tucker is in this photo. I could have used more old school Romulan Empire stuff, but I knew that wasn't in the cards. I'm looking forward to more of these films (inevitable now), and can't wait to see what they'll do with the Klinks (very likely antagonists).

SUPER WEB DESIGN AWARD!

I dug this gem up while hunting the wild wild internet. This site has so much good stuff going on, it's hard to start in any one place. The wildly spinning atoms? The sweet photos of random excited people? Sunglasses? Text trains? Repeating fades? Jumping letters? Oh my. This shit is tiiiiight.

SOME SORTA PARTY THING...

I found this on the internet.